riding on a sure shot
by cybersteins
Summary: It takes a lot to integrate former prison runners, criminals, and lab experiments into a stable community. It'll take even more to convince Hawk a village like Konoha is up to the task. Or, conversely, 'how I learned to stop worrying and love the missing nin.' Mature initial Karin/Sai.


A/N: For Karin/Sai happening alone, I was very tempted to list this under the 'horror' category. It's one of those 'laugh while slowly backing away' pairings.

**Warning** for, like, Team Taka. Juugo said it best: reprehensible assholes. All that implies.

This is AU of canon events from Sasuke and Hawk being taken by Madara following Itachi's death. What followed that will come out later.

Oh God. I also imply many ships across the sexual preference galaxy. It's getting pretty long. 'Might actually put half an ass through this' long.

* * *

><p>Rough, loud, violent were terms better categorized for describing animalistic showcasing like 'wildlife rutting.' However, if Karin was willing to remember, referring to this 'situation' as anything else would be a big fat lie. She would summon the echoes of an intense rage had coupled with an intensely out<em>rageous<em> orgasm, while Sai gasped underneath her, practically helpless.

Remembering that might have made her snort.

But she didn't like to remember, because remembering would require remembering how it started.

Like how she'd been having a private moment with Sasuke when that loud, obnoxious traffic cone of a moronic bijuu container crashed into the forest shrieking his name like a banshee. The mood was ruined. Sasuke completely ignored her, almost like he had no idea they were going to rub all over each other in the forest like horny squirrels and Suigetsu and Juugo magically vanished through the haze of their passion. No. He and stupid Hick Leaf Village Boy reject were suddenly in each other's faces. Well, Annoying Boy was in his face, and fuck, he started crying while he was angrily yelling things Karin found incredibly boring, like friendship and promises and feelings (she wanted to scream at him to just go write some emo poetry in his room like everybody else, _gawd_).

Then she met Sai.

Wait. No, first she met Pinkie. A soft, cotton-candy-fluffy goody two shoes worriedly watching Fashion Reject like he was going to fall apart if she looked away. Karin totally wouldn't put up with that bull shit, and she was thinking how she was going to show the Obviously Other Abandoned Loser Teammate how she'd successfully kept Sasuke's interest as a comrade - 'Conversing with Your Volatile Submissive' by Tojo Chie - when THEN she met Sai.

She'd paused at first, because really, he was the sort of boy bordering on pretty. Not actually beautiful, no one would ever be on the same level as Sasuke. But it was enough to make her blink and force the pissed off expression she could hardly completely get rid of most of the time to slide off her face. He had that vulnerable look you practically never see on guys except in staged porn, curious and sort of wide eyed. It was disarming on someone that moved older than Goody Two Shoes and Fucking SHUT UP Already Friendship Overlord, and yet still looked younger than her.

Like Pinkie, he was focused on Sasuke and Fruit Suit in a way suggesting she, Juugo, and Suigetsu were chopped liver. Fine by her in that moment, she was watching that pretty, pale mouth open slowly, breathe for a moment, and then, blandly, with a low voice that was very pleasant (but NOT the molton chocolate doomsday felt in my labia™ that was Sasuke's voice):

"This is our second meeting, and I still do not see why you talk about him in your sleep, Naruto-kun."

There was a different mood-breaking silence. Rationally someone might have laughed. Or been stunned, horrified, traumatized.

Karin was used to having prisoners kneel, and grabbing Suigetsu pants where his crotch was when he pissed her off so she could temporarily rip it off by moving too fast for his fluid body to keep up. She condescended often that she did not have to have rational _anything_.

Unleashing a seething screech of her own to blow "It's All About Me, Sasuke! ME!"Boy out of the water, one moment there was only red obscuring her alpha vision for anyone degrading Sasuke's desirability (unless it was sexual degradation, and she was allowed to watch, then it was A-OK), then next she punched him across the face so hard he stumbled into a tree and continued picking his loser ass apart, kicking his gonads until she hoped his bits vanished forever, yelling who the fuck was he to talk about a shinobi like Sasuke like that.

Sasuke yanked her off him, and she distantly registered Suigetsu looking at her in a little awe, probably because it had been a while since he saw her rage directed at someone other than him. Juugo was also focusing more on her as if she were the one to dominate his Issues, and Pinkie and Stupid Kid (she later loudly told his name was Naruto, to which she deadpanned she never gave a flying fuck) were pulling Sai towards them with a disturbed look hypocritical people give because they never admit understanding wanting to rip someone apart.

After immediately forgetting the pervert, because Sasuke was touching her protectively and glaring at the three for following him like the toilet paper on his heel they were, there was a bit of silence. Then, Pinkie coughed and with a calculated look suggested that everyone was very tired and really, there was something important they needed to tell Sasuke-kun (Karin had to raise an eyebrow at that) and there was an inn about thirty miles away that was secured by two, trusted Anbu nin, where they could all take their time without worrying about attack. Suigetsu snarked they could just say it here and get the fuck out, but Naruto started to explode saying something he cut himself off at and glared at the ground, and before Karin could smirk at the frustration boiling around his dumb blond head that she saw as approaching defeat, Sasuke about gave all of them a stroke by saying, "Fine."

He also added, "but you're paying since you're taking up our time," so that made it a little better and a little less like Karin should double check he wasn't possessed by lingering effects of Madara or something.

Sai was still unconscious, not that she cared. He was a shitty Anbu having such a foul mouth perving over Sasuke and no dodging skills. What the hell even were Leaf rankings these days, for fuck's sake.

000000000000000000

Karin knows she's taking a while getting to the First Horrific(ally Amazing) Sex with a Leaf Anbu, and her current predicament, but it takes a while for her to admit all this actually happened, dammit.

To be honest it's amazing she didn't just block that entire week on Fang Country border off to save the remaining teaspoon of dignity she has left. Not ten minutes to the inn after a quiet half day's journey, Suigetsu was being a moron and flirting with Goody Two Shoes until she punched him fifty feet, past a shrieking inn manager holding their room assignments. Karin didn't bother to look up from monitoring Juugo's chakra fluctuations, which often inflamed in tense company, let alone hours with them. Over all they were on their best behavior - Sasuke didn't have to tell Suigetsu to stop bickering with her before he left them both tied to a tree with a sign 'Free to Good Home' once.

Naruto and Sasuke were shuffled off alone in one of the larger rooms, because Sakura said, in that fake voice, like the rest of Hawk were idiots, they needed space at one point, to take it now, rather than kill each other, because there wasn't time for it. Something about the Uchiha's and the Kyuubi written somewhere in Konoha.

Outside her own room, Karin straightened her glasses, clutching an empty takeout box from room service. Whatever. It had been over a year since Madara was dead. The past four months, Hawk had initiated and settled business with Fang (and by extension, another deal for Sound), and planned to pick up on Suigetsu's Pokemon obsession with the hidden swords. Sasuke hadn't even breathed in the direction of Konoha the Village that is Hidden Like All the Others Because No One Really Gives a Fuck Finding It. _Get over it_, she wanted to snap at the moping Blondie, when it was apparently Pinkie's turn alone with "Sasuke-kun." _Stop hanging onto toothpick-like straws to keep your grip on Sasuke. You were _dumped.

She hadn't realized she'd been muttering this out loud until there was a light-hearted, almost self-deprecating, _chuckle_ behind her making her twitch. She normally never attributed anything so perfectly masculine to anyone but Sasuke but there was simply no other word for it (well, that and, Sasuke never did anything remotely with self-deprecation to her knowledge. Really, the closest to 'light-hearted' was the moment between naming some target/weird tree/woodland creature about to become dinner 'Madara', and then chidori'ing the fuck out of it.).

She whirled around to find the pervert in the hallway with her (and how _were_ these assholes sneaking up on her?). Not leaning against the ledge sexily or anything like that. Just standing there with a stupid close-eyed smile and his hands like dead puppet arms at his sides.

"What the hell do you want?"

"Nothing." God, his closed eyes and smile felt like its own volume. "I was just-" Seriously. "Wanting to subtly alert to you-" Were all Leaf elite like this? "My humor in finding relation to your feelings." Maybe Orochimaru flattened Leaf because it still had embarrassing failed projects like this giving _him_ nightmares.

Karin raised an eyebrow. Why should she care about hearing his feelings? Sasuke and Suigetsu didn't talk about their feelings, and Juugo only did as needed because it's thoughtful to warn your friends you might want to rip off their heads in about five minutes. What did she mistakenly give off to imply she was different from them? Her eyes narrowed with a guess. She shoved her takeout in the trashcan, and glared briefly out over the balcony into the dusty, one street this pit stop had.

Sai, for some bizarre reason, thought this was an indication to step for closer confidence. She saw his eyes were blank, shadows casting on his pale face from the night lanterns, but at least they were open, and Karin refused to move. "Sasuke-kun is a still considered a Leaf shinobi by Naruto-kun and Sakura-san. Faced before their emotions, despite the Missing Nin decree, the Fifth Hokage believes this too."

Karin, over her folded arms, started tapping her shoulder with a finger impatiently.

She'd profiled so many boys like him she couldn't remember a single face.

"With your bonds to Sasuke-kun, it could stand to reason the Leaf have a kinder interest towards you as well."

She stopped tapping. With a final look at him, she pulled back the door and stepped inside. He followed her in, sealing it behind them. When she reached the middle of the room, she turned.

"It's hilarious," she said nastily, "Leaf hunts Sasuke, but thinks we'll be convinced we're lost kids needing and anxious to be saved. The fairy tale Konoha doesn't exist. It never has. You assholes don't want Sasuke out of the goodness of your heart, you want him because Konoha can't stand its inability to control Sound. You can tell your separate superior from _them_," she gestured with her head, "Our guard will never be down to cheap illusions like that."

"Cheap..." Sai's eyes closed again and defaulted to that shit smile. This smug asshole thought he could do a wide, passive-aggressive web on her?

He thought because he was Leaf Anbu, and her picture wasn't in some stupid book, he could outlast her?

"One should be more conscientious before new friends...violent whore."

There was the briefest moment of utter silence where Karin stared at the stupid look on his face before his statement, or at least the last two words, sank through her half-spiky haired head.

With an unearthly shriek better suited to demons, Karin hurled herself at him, nails raking her jacket zipper, intent on reaching her skin where she'd always worked best.

It threw him, as her un-kunoichi, inelegant approach usually did. The first time, he hadn't had intelligence on her reactions to Sasuke being insulted, and never could have calculated her reaction. Then there was the key, missing intelligence more dangerous than even the disturbing sight of her skin - the chains burst from her. With hisses and lashes, they smashed through the splintering floor as they secured the limbs she'd held.

"Stronger, scarier dick bags than you have cried for their mommies, _do you hear me_?" She screeched, the hand around his throat distancing by the growing chains, preventing him from responding.

She heard the Leaf kunoichi calling in alarm outside the door, and maybe Suigetsu. From her back, Karin blasted another strain of chains to where she detected the chakra of their bodies. Amid the tearing of paper and a terrified shriek, Karin turned to face the Anbu again, hand poised, when something caught her attention. Or rather, poked her attention.

She looked down, and raised her hips a little to be sure. Without a warning, she ripped his pants down to be double sure.

"You have _got_ to be kidding me."

He, meanwhile, didn't seem to understand her scarred breasts bouncing faintly while she pinned him.


End file.
